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The complete history of the USS Lutonia NCC-1996 - Part I
The history of the USS Lutonia is a fine example of a crew coming together and despite many hurdles overcoming them, against all the odds —Admiral Andrew P Fazekas
Commanding Officer.
Stardate: 12.09.03
Members were divided up into two teams who were given different discs to insert into separate terminals and had to watch the clips for different clues to questions which appeared on the screens for a short time before fading away. The teams then had to open different sealed packs to find the correct answers to those questions. The answers also contained co-ordinates to a map each team had. Then each team selected members to go outside to find the next disc which had been hidden around the area by the events team using torches and maps to find those discs oh and did we forget to mention those team members going outside were racing against the clock due to the beam down tokens they needed to go out in the first place which were also on a timer.
Then when teams completed the task of finding all of the discs they then had to take control of a robot and by using a large screen guide it along a pathway dodging the alien tank in order to find a final set of clues on a hidden piece of alien technology. Once they had the clues the teams then had to decipher the strange alien alphabet in order to uncover a secret spy in the other team and win the day. Once again the Admirals team won the day thanks to some great team work. Unfortunately the Admiral was also unmasked as the spy by the opposite team members. The evening was rounded off with an episode and a raffle that had so many prizes thanks to Richard Daubney that everyone one including Richard won lots of prizes and our new member even taking home the Lurve albums donated by the Crouchers. Lastly on the night there were three renewal memberships and one new membership.
Stardate: 04.07.03 - The Independence mission
Held at the Co-op Hall kicked off with getting attending members off their seats to perform in alternative versions of Star Trek. Members were divided into groups and given scripts from which to work from. The only difference being that members had to play characters as other people for example Steve Maguire played Captain Kirk in the mould of Captain Birdseye with hilarious results and the Admiral played Uhura as an American GI Joe, other examples on display included gay versions of other Star Trek characters. Everyone thought the role play was very funny especially as there was no rehearsals allowed and members had just minutes to compose themselves before treading the stage.
This was followed by the now customary raffle with Richard Daubney who had renewed his membership on the night and brought along a friend who also showed an interest in joining the Lutonia, winning a large model of the Enterprise D. Richard spoke about this going on display as soon as he got this home. Afterwards the evening finished with a vote by the members for which activity they wanted to do next. The choice was a video Quiz or watch Star Trek or Lilo and Stitch the movie. In a one sided vote the members voted for Lilo and Stitch as an they had voted not to watch Independence day due mainly to the fact it was two hours too long and Independence Day being and American thing about beating the British, more about this later on Borg View.
Stardate: 06.06.03 - Thunderbirds are Go
A Large contingent of members beamed in for the recent Classic Science Fiction evening held in Adrian Nicholson's quarters which provided us with the luxury of a big screen as well as a TV. Just as well really as members got to see the Thunderbirds team pull off one hundred great rescues. The seen of the Tracey boys in action had the crew glued to the screens for over one hour. Would they complete their mission before the strings snapped ? Thrilling stuff I am sure you would agree.
Next up Futurama and a episode featuring large brains invading the Earth and making everyone stupid except Fry. Who although being stupid already did enough to save the day by trapping the master brain in a story book. Had us in stitches all the way through. Lastly came Joe 90 and a really ridiculous plot where Joe helped to save a spy from the Russians who was a piano playing star. No plot and Joe was off key !!!!
Stardate:30.05.03 - USS Lutonia Reaches Seven Years Itch
Last May the Lutonia reached it’s seventh Year of existence. Members celebrated at the Co-op Hall with a Birthday Cake made by Dawn Rowe and a short selection of games and quizzes. Then came the main item as members were treated to Nemesis and this was especially good for those members who still had not seen the movie at the cinema mainly due to the fact it was only on in Luton for one week following poor attendances. The event itself was well attended and it is hoped the Lutonia will still be around for it’s eighth birthday in 2004.
Stardate: 18.05.03 - May The Force Be With You - Away Mision
Five members of the USS Lutonia embarked aboard two Pillager class shuttles for the "May the force be with you" away mission. This was a historic day for the Lutonia as we would be physically attacking another star trek club. And as we were going as members of the new Lutonia Borg collective. We would assimilate them as resistance is futile, but as the day proved it was dam well wet as well. The drones set off complete with pirate flags flying from the roof of the lead shuttle. Arriving at Starbase we passed the station spotting large numbers of Starbase crew preparing their weapons. It did not help to find the area covered in wanted posters featuring the Admiral for crimes against Starbase 410.
Having set down the shuttles a short distance from Starbase, we armed ourselves with laser rifles and Borg shields and proceeded with caution. We were easily spotted and although heavily out numbered five to one we launched an attack on Starbase itself. Although we did not have the element of surprise we did have the element of the Starbase crew not knowing our numbers and strength. And following a charge by Luton of Carles-Borg and the drone known as Mark. The Starbase crew fell back and retreated. Having secured the perimeter an attempt was then made to push Starbase back further. However sheer force of numbers and weapons including a laser cannon forced us back to our original position.
An attempt was made to attack Starbase down their flanks which was met with disaster when Luton of Carles- Borg got himself cut off from the other drones and in a scene reminiscent of Custers last stand got himself soaked and captured. What followed next was a trial by water Starbase 410 style. Luton was physically tied to a chair unable to move and his protected shielding removed. Then at the Starbase mercy a bucket of ice cold water was poured over him and he was shot at close range by all Starbase members. However in a surprise twist a senior member of Starbase got herself assimilated by the Lutonia Borg not only this but the Carles-Borg itself was retained for drinking afterwards. Of course everyone was a winner on the day and a good meal was had on the way
Stardate: 11.05.03 - Trekkies 2 Away Mission
Boldly going where some other clubs decided not to go. Members of the Lutonia featured in the new film "Trekkies 2" which can be viewed at the cinema next year. The filming took place at a Heathrow hotel often used for Star Trek conventions. An away team was assembled at the last minute following frantic calls to find out who could actually go on the mission on stardate: 11.5.3. Eventually an away team was assembled and set off for a once in a lifetime mission.
The crew met some new faces namely Denise Crosby and her film crew and some old faces in Keith Batt and John Kelly who were there to promote their event. More of that further in this issue of the fanzine. There were around just twenty or so Star Trek fans attending, most of them from the Lutonia. People were divided up into groups to be interviewed by Denise about their views about trek and what it means to be a Trekkie or Trekker. Except for the Admiral who insisted on being filmed and interviewed by himself to put forward a different opinion to the one being touted by most of the others there who did not know the Admiral very well at all.
Alexander Caraca certainly stole the spotlight and most of the views seem to centre around how important Star Trek was to it’s fans and how annoying it was to be labelled an Anorak. This was a term the Americans had not heard of and had to be explained to them. Unfortunately some trek fans from other dimensions referred to American fans as Anoraks and spoke about the great British Reserve and while at it slated football fans (see Borg page). However the away team had fun and buried some old hatchets at the same time.
Stardate: 25.04.03 - Paranormal Misson
This was to be only the second and very last Paranormal evening ever to be held by Lutonia. Members attending were treated to bugs swarming and ghostly happenings of a scary kind.
Stardate: 28.03.03 - Lutonia Marches On Event
The month of March saw the Lutonia return to the Co-Hall in Stockingstone Road Luton. The event also saw the return of some members who had gone AWOL since the move to Surrey Street. Mainly because they were not keen on the venue and preferred the Co-op. The March event consisted of two rounds of Borgo. A video quiz and a video vote in which Babylon 5 once again lost out to Star Trek. All in all a good evening was had by all those members who attended.
Stardate 07.02.03 - Exhibition Evening
Science Fiction fans attending the recent Lutonia main event on Stardate: 7.02.03 were in for a treat as the evening kicked off with a virtual tour of the Star Trek exhibition currently on display in London. Thanks to members who had gone on an away mission to the exhibition. Members who had not yet beamed there managed to not only see what they were missing out on. But also to find out facts and information about the exhibition.
There was a rubbish item literally as members and guests had to build a robot from scratch using household materials. There were some very innovative ideas as the cadets and adults alike let their imagination run wild. The winning entry coming from Alexander Caraca with his Robot costume made up of various materials including a robot arm made from empty lager cans. His robot logo being "the only robot that can refresh the parts other robots cannot reach" enough said really.
The evening finishing with a choice between Babylon 5 and Star Trek the next generation and of course it was no contest as members voted to watch Star Trek. Most of the Fellowship turned out to the first February event the Lutonia has run for some years. The evening was not just about the excellent entertainment put on by the events team. But also a chance to buy both science fiction memorabilia and Lutonia products from the Fellowship shop and tuck shop on site and to socialise with other like minded fans.
Stardate: 24.01.03 - Pitch Black Mission
This was a mission not for those easily scared of the dark. And despite some members unable to make it due to being in sick bay under doctors orders with flu. There were still plenty of members brave enough to volunteer for the Pitch Black Mission. The mission started innocently enough with an episode of Futurama where fry met his Star Trek heroes and fought an alien entity. Lots of cliches to look for in this episode.
Then onto Small Soldiers where the crew met the Commando Elite. Toy action figures with a "there will be no mercy, American Attitude". Opposing them were the peace loving Gorgonites who were kind loving but unusual looking creatures. Teenager Alan Abernathy got enlisted to help the Gorgonites and the rescue the girl of his dreams as they battled with the Commando Elite. Lots of good special effects make this a very funny family film and everyone enjoyed this. Except for the chair the Admiral was sitting on which collapsed while the Admiral was still sitting in it.
Next up was the main item "Pitch Black" where the daylight can burn you, but the darkness can kill you. Members experienced the psychological terror of a group of space travellers marooned on a planet with a deadly secret. A pack of terrifying creatures whose only weakness is the light. However a deadly eclipse of the planets three suns occurs leaving them in total darkness. With little power and dwindling numbers as they are slowly picked off one by one. The doomed travellers turn to a vicious convict played by Vin Diesel. He has the appetite for destruction and eerie eyes that can guide them through the darkness to what fate awaits them.
At the end of the mission only two members namely Eppie Saunders and Bobby Presley had failed to complete the mission. Finding instead their own version of Pitch Black zzzz.
Stardate: 22.12.02
As this was probably the last time the Lutonia would be using the Co-op Hall for a Christmas party. It turned out to be an evening full of surprises and fun from the minute the disco started the first song of the evening. Almost all of the membership managed to get to the party along with some newcomers who had never been to a club event before. Fun was had on the dance floor with a sound selection of songs and some members taking things to extreme for ditties like Cotton Eye Joe and songs from grease the movie. Of course everyone was up for the classics such as Doctorin the tardis.
Our resident rappers MC Admiral Andy and MC Treasure Steve otherwise known as two not so sober chaps and a tombola compared both the raffle and the prize TV draw which was won by the Admirals daughter Paula Fazekas who was visiting the club for the first time. The prize draw itself raised £61 for the club and the raffle and entry funds on the night also did very well and helped cover the cost of the event. Behind the scenes work was put in from both Amanda Drew who provided the Christmas buffet and Mark Cornwall for the disco. Many thanks also went to Christine May who is the newest member of the Lutonia. Christine who lives in Cheltenham kindly donated the funds for the new colour TV. The only sour note of the night on one table was seeing two pints of lager left behind by two chaps.
Stardate: 01.11.02 - Surrey Streets Ahead
Our first main event held at Surrey Street Junior and Infants School proved a surprising successful evening. Despite no BAR !!! And members having to find the venue for the first time. The attendance was higher than events of a similar nature held at another venue.
The Lutonia had it’s first ever tuck shop which did well and the prices of tuck were very reasonable and at an affordable rate to members. Also there was a shop on site to supply Lutonia merchandise to members. Better still the lower cost of the hall meant the discount could be passed onto the members themselves in the form of even lower airlock entry prices.
The entertainment consisted of the next phase of the interactive Borg CD Rom game. In which members had to once again outwit the Borg and put up with some outrageous comments from the king of puns himself namely Q. Next came another favourite home made game of intergalactic warfare using overhead camera’s and a huge board and four starships. After this the members were divided into four crews to face each other in battle.
Once again the Admirals ship was the main focus of attack only this time it not only had the highest ranking officers in the fellowship on board. It also had real interstellar warp in the form of some very large Stella nacelles. Time and again the Admirals ship survived attack and in the end totally obliterated the opposition thanks to a good crew. However all the members won as everyone had a lot of fun and enjoyed themselves. Some members even passed favourable comments on the hall itself and how it was good to get back to our roots.
Stardate: 13.10.02 - Pasque Fundrasing Event
Daniel Praid and Mark Cornwall managed to raise £125 for the Pasque Hospice Charity. This involved a grueling 5 mile walk in their Starfleet Uniforms.
Stardate: 11.10.02 - Joe 90 Classic Evening
The October Classic evening provided attending members with some real surprises. In the film "The Day The Earth Caught Fire" characters included a certain Sir John Kelly and a certain Maguire who resembled Rumpole of the bailey.
Did they save the Earth ? We will never know as members voted them off the screen to be replaced by "When Worlds Collide". Other gems included Thunderbirds and Star Trek. Also Joe 90 made two appearances as he fought off the bad guys to once again save the world with the help of his father and uncle Sam.
Stardate: 06.09.02 - USS Lutonia fellowship £ Event.
There were no Euro’s at this event which certainly could not have been staged in the rest of Europe. As this was a special £ event which meant that all adult members could enter the airlocks for just £1 and all cadets were allowed in for free. Other alien life forms had to pay the usual non members latinum fee. Henceforth most of the Lutonia and some other aliens were present for what turned out to be the best event of the year so far thanks to our hard working events team.
Firstly we had a team game in the form of a interactive Borg game. Using a large screen for effect the members had to take action against the Borg at Wolf 359 with some help from Q himself. After some deaths and assimilation's the crew managed to get off the bridge of the USS Righteous. Such a noble name for a Federation ship. They then made their way into engineering where they have been left stranded until the next event in November.
Following an awards presentation ceremony the crew had a game of battleships featuring some technical ideas such as cameras in the ceiling looking down on a scene of destruction as the Admirals ship captained by Cadet Alexander Caraca was totally ambushed and blown to pieces by the USS Jones ship which had some how acquired total shield protection. Fortunately what goes around comes around and the USS Jones got their come uppence. The eventual winners being the crewed by the Drews and Daniel Praid. Of course the real winners were the members who had turned up and had an enjoyable evening. There was also a club shop selling many items from video collections to Lutonia T-shirts and the shop proved very popular with the crew.
Stardate: 16.08.02 - Jolly Todgers night.
Only Four brave souls made it to the Melson arms on Friday 16th August. Was it due to the Elvis Presley thing. No, it was due to summer holidays and other duties.
Stardate: 02.08.02 - Classic Ladies night - report by Ann Jones.
It was a quiet evening at the Jone’s. Only Ann, Eppe, Mark and Andy were available to attend. We had a visitor from Hemel Hempstead named Chris to look at the club and see if he liked us. We showed Hercules, Total Recall and Andromeda. Then some of the members had to leave nearly forgetting the collection. We then watched Dungeons and dragons and nobody fell asleep. Lady members of the club chose all the films and episodes.
Stardate: 05.07.02 Assimilated event.
The Lutonia July event was cancelled at the last minute as the Borg had taken over the ship and left no facilities for the crew to use. Despite frantic efforts by the crew it was Wolf 359 all over again.
Stardate: 07.06.02 - Godzilla v Mechogodzilla
A well attended event in Jarlaths quarters meant seating was in demmand. Members watched a selection of science fiction videos and got to see a rare appearance by the Sex Pistols on Top of the pops singing God Save The Queen during the interval and at the Admirals insistance of re-educating everyone in the art of pop music. After this came the Godzilla movie which had everyone in stitches with its Japanese translations and special effects. The main feature of the evening turned out to be the film "Final Fantasy" which kept everyone glued to his or her seats.
Stardate: 31.05.02 - The <insert title here> Event
Depending on the amount of people attending this event, it was going to be either a games night or a film night. When 15 people turned up it was almost certain that it was going to be a film night - that was if I could get the computer up and running. After several nerve wrecking reboots the PC behaved and we had sound and vision! Starting at 7:30 and running into the very late hours we managed to watch "Scorpion King" and "The Mummy". A very enjoyable evening was had by all.
Stardate:17.05.02 - Jolly Todgers Pub Night
The alternative holographic life forms currently residing on the USS Lutonia went out in force for a night of beer, rock music and fun. Dressed in their Pirate uniforms the Todgers made their Jolly way from the deep space stations known as the Melson Arms, George and the Bridge Pubs. The beers flowed and someone had switched off the safety as the lagers had real alcohol in them. It is hoped the next mission will be a trip to a local rock concert.
Stardate:15.05.02 - USS Lutonia Fellowship Of Science Fiction-Presidential Election
The USS Lutonia looking tired and worn has put into space dock for a major facelift following the now completed next generation mission. Following a debriefing on recent events the crew were all invited to attend the re-launch of the USS Lutonia and shown the new orders for a deep space mission. Due to the length of time the Lutonia has been in space, Some of the crew were away on shore leave having fun. However the rest of the crew turned up in order to see the new look Lutonia launched. Also the crew voted for an elected President who would oversee the new departments involved in the running of the ship. The crewmember who has been elected to Presidential status is Andrew Fazekas and his term of office will be for one year to see if the mission is successful. Provisional Co-ordinaters were also invited to set help up the departments.
Stardate:03.05.02 - Club Sixth Birthday Event
No Disco this year however members turning up were asked to put on entertianment themselves in the form of variuos stalls. Members had worked hard on many different ideas from alien key rings to engineering projects and holidays. It worked well and members who attended were pleased with the result if not the attendance.
Stardate:17.04.02 - USS Lutonia Club AGM
The club held it’s annual AGM at the Co-op Hall. There was a good turn out of members for the evening. Events took an unexpected turn however when during the procces of the AGM. Outgoing chairman made a proposal as an ordinary club member for a new structure and slight change of name for the club. He suggested that there should be no committee structure and in it’s place there should be a hub management structure organsied by an elected President. Where all club members could attend smaller group meetings called Departments run by Co-ordinaters that would undertake variuos duties. Furthermore as a sign of change and the club moving forward the name should be change from the USS Lutonia Science Fiction Club to the USS Lutonia Fellowship Of Science Fiction. Lastly the Constitution to be ammended. The members were taken completly unaware by this and an intense discussion followed. Then the members took an historic step and voted by a majority for change. A date was set for a Presidential election.
Stardate:10.04.02 - Club Open Forum
The Club held an Open Forum evening recently which was attended by a third of the club membership. Among items discussed by members was the AGM, Survey forms, Admission prices for members and non-members at events, cadet activities, and the May Event. At the meeting clubmember Catti Caraca volunteered to organise a family picnic in the park for the crew. Members also discussed moving to a new venue and if that involved a bar or not.
Stardate: 05.04.02 "Battle of the Treks" Classic Science Fiction Evening
The competition was tough and the venue was packed for the April Classic Science Fiction Evening. Members of the Lutonia crew turned out in force to witness the theme for the evening which was "Battle of the Treks". Where it would be decided once and for all which series of Star Trek really was the best in the world ever. The evening started with a warm up taster from the cartoon series of "Star Trek" for the cadets.
Then battle commenced and without a phaser being fired new series "Enterprise" got off to a bad start with a complete no show. Then it was onto Star Trek the original series and an episode was chosen called "spectre of the gun". Kirk and the boys had to check out a planet inhabited by the Melkotians who had already warned Kirk not to go there. But you know Jim and he did and ended up in the old wild west. Tombstone 1881 to be precise. Kirk and his gang now known as the "Clantons" had to take out the rival mob headed by Doc Holiday and the Earps at the OK Corral. Well Kirk did not get the woman in this episode, but still won the day. The episode was strong on humour such as the gas canister scene in a bar with Scotty drinking scotch for medical purposes only. Next up was Captain Picard and the crew of "Star Trek the Next Generation". Featuring an episode called "Eye of the Beholder" where a young officer kills himself and sets off a chain reaction of jealousy, new passions and lurve in true Klingon style that kept the members glued to the screen.
Into battle came the crew of DS9 and the episode "The siege of AR-558". Lots of action in true John Wayne "Alamo" style, fighting the Dominion forces. Captain Sisko bravely led the way with help from Nog the Ferengi. Last up was Voyager and the only female captain had to contend with giant viruses and tac tac’s from an episode called "Macrocosm". Where Voyager had become infected. Janeway had her work cut out and the viruses had no chance as they were wiped out. Kirk, Picard, Sisko, Janeway, who was it to be ? Well Kirk polled the most votes and Picard came second. The members then settled down to watch victorious Kirk and the boys in "Mirror, Mirror". Which proves "TOS" really is
Stardate: 08.03.02 - Future's Edge Spectacular
After some very hard work by the organiser and a late change of venue (thanks to the Croucher's for making their house available at the last minute). A very good evening was enjoyed by all that attended. There was much merriment, food and drinks along with some excellent films such as the Matrix, Pitch black and Wing Commander. There was so much fun being had by all that the event continued into the early hours. Unfortunately the event was not well attended by club members.
Stardate: 15.02.02 - Jolly Todgers Holographic Event
Members of the club who went on the first ever Holograhic life forms first night out. The life forms from the USS Lutonia got to enjoy four holographic programmes namely the Great Northern, Brooks, the The Bridge Tavern and lastly The George II. All the programmes contained life like alcohol and some great rock music. Members are already looking forward to the next Jolly Todgers night out which will consist of live bands.
Stardate: 01.02.02 - Classic ZZZZZZZZ - Fi Event
A good turn out at the recent "Night of the Black and Whites" classic science fiction event saw the members treated to the Quatermass Special, It ! Terror from beyond Space and Timeslip, where in the end no one cared what happened to the two children stuck at the North Pole. One crew member had us in fits when she fell asleep and snored at warp factor 10. Further to this members enjoyed seeing many other sides of Sci-fi such as Star Trek, Dr Who, as well as some crap monsters. Many thanks go to the Crouchers for their hospitality.
Stardate: 25.01.02 - Lutonia Boldy Goes Forth Event
Despite the competition from some 200 Line Dancers who showed more than a passing interest in our club as they took many application forms with them. The
Lutonia proved it could compete with the best of them as the night consisted of silly hats and some excellent music. Add to this a sound clip quiz, what’s in the bag, and not forgetting Black Adder made for some great fun to be had by the members. Though there were some club members missing through other commitments. The club did get three renewals and one new membership on the night. There were three teams who battled it out on the night for the prize of owning some Flying Saucers. Two of the teams had many players and once again the pub team consisted of just three who were going well until sheer numbers over came them. Once again thanks go to Mark Cornwall and Phil Doyle who put in some hard work on and before the night to supply the entertainment.
Stardate: 22.12.01 - Christmas Party Success
USS Lutonia crew members enjoyed a very successful Christmas party to finish off a year of success which will surely be hard to repeat in 2002. However Lutonia
members were not the only people present. Also present were members of the Genesis club who managed to win a fresh turkey. We also had a fair amount of first
time visitors curious to see what we got up to. The evening consisted of a fancy dress theme and competition for both adults and children. Then came a Jolly Todgers adult game. Based loosely on musical chairs but with a pub theme. The game consisted of nine rounds where contestants had to achieve their mission. It started innocently enough with finding something science fiction and blowing up balloons.
However as the game went on the missions became more dangerous and the last contestant was eliminated from each round. During the course of the game the contestants had to find items of clothing from socks and shoes and persuade someone to write their own names on their foreheads. Pose on a imaginary catwalk for our version of popstars with a "I’m too sexy" round. Lastly the game finished off with the remaining finalists having to go out into the audience to find a woman’s bra and some trousers. Zorro almost won it in a tie breaker where himself and the Blues Brother namely John Kelly had to go out and get a cracker to sit on their knees. Unfortunately Zorro and his companion managed to fall off the chair otherwise they would have won. But it was not the winning that counted but the laugh it gave everyone. Other sights on the night included a nun, Miss Poland 2001, Batman, a pink fairy and a man dressed up as Frank-N-Furter from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Also included in the fancy dress theme was a Teddy tubby, another two blues brothers, Laura Croft, Bo-Peep and a white fairy. Which made for a very enjoyable evening.
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